Wooo Yeah

It's days like today that make me really happy I don't smoke anymore.
I don't want to walk for five minutes in this weather, let alone stand still in it. It's terrible out.

When the weather gets like this I think about an anti-smoking PSA that they used to run all the time. There was a long sweeping shot of the deserted snowy grounds of a boarding school or penitentiary (it was hard to tell which). The wind was howling and it was obvious that no one in their right mind would go out in a storm like this. No one but (bum bum bummm) a smoker. At the gate of this institution was a young guy, shivering in nothing but a t-shirt, slowly smoking a cigarette.

I've always had a lot of problems with this ad.
Number one - why isn't he wearing a coat? Smoking fucks with your circulation. Smokers are always cold. No smoker is going out in negative a billion temperatures without a coat on. Or at least a sweater.
Number two - Why does this guy not stand directly outside of the building? Who in their right mind is going to walk down the mile and a half long driveway to the gate of this thing to smoke? Nobody. Nobody would do this. Especially not in a t-shirt.
Number three - Why is he smoking so slowly? Again, this would not happen. That cigarette would be sucked down in three drags and followed by stamping around inside going "fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck it's COLD."

I have a lot of problems with PSAs in general. The anti-marijuana one where stoned teenagers run over a three year old on a tricycle at the drive thru? Stupid. Where are the three year olds parents? Why are they allowed to ride their tricycle on the side of the highway? I have never seen stoned people act the way the people in the PSAs do. Most stoned people I know are really into snacks and video games. Or doodling. Or delivery. They are not (usually) going out and doing things. Paranoia and New York City don't mix too well.

I've never met a stoned person who thought they could talk to their dog. Or fly. Being stoned has never put anyone I know in grave danger. The worst that could happen is ODing on Jello. And much worse has happened.

I just wish these things were more realistic.